Husband 1.0

Thursday, November 22 Leave a Comment

Dear Technical Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance — particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. The new program also began making unexpected changes to the accounting modules.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0, and Golf Clubs 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I’ve tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,

Desperate

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Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.

Please enter the command: ” C:/ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME” and try to download Tears 6.2 and don’t forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.

If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.

Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources).

Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.

You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Food 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,
Tech Support

2 comments »

  • Carneyz said:  

    I did install Food 3.0 and keep on upgrading to 3.1 & latest version, 5.0 which I downloaded from www.motherinlawrecipes.com. Hot Lingerie 7.7 came in a package when upgrading to Husband 1.0.

    But still, Jewelry 2.0 only run on the day I installed Husband 1.0 and then has stopped responding totally! Also, Flower 3.5 only re-boot say, on a particular date once a year, after various attempts at entering commands.

    Please help me to re-install Husband 1.0 properly in order to get Flower 3.5 & Jewelry 2.0 to run properly. I get a little bit envious when I heard other users talk about how wonderful their applications run with their new Husband 1.0 OS.

    P/S: How to install additional software, SurpriseGift 7.0? I've always wanted to install this, but so far Husband 1.0 always spits out the installer.

  • striker said:  

    Assalamualaikum,

    huhu.. this is amusingly funny..

    i was thinking, to make it work, perhaps Mrs Carneyz should try SurpriseGift Special Edition 1.0 [another name of the uber-popular Child 1.0]?

    What say you Mr. Junaidix? :p